Is it normal to feel this way about oneself/life?

It's not that I necessarily hate myself, well I guess I do... But it's more that I just despise the world? I mean like I do hate myself, I think I'm fat, ugly, stupid, etc. My friends tell me I'm super skinny and cute all the time but since their my friends it means nothing to me... I just wish they would tell me that I'm ugly and stupid so I know they what they actually think of me. I'm not depressed! I'm just tired... Tire of me, tired of my life, and tired of this world. Sometimes it takes all I have not to off myself or run away. And like I said it's not because I'm depressed! I just feel that if I died or ran away I would have a chance at a life I want to live. I don't have a bad home life and I guess I do ok in school but nothing I see or hear or do really interests me. Things can be fun for a moment but then there gone. For the longest time I've had such casual indifference to everything. It's come to the point where I don't like waking up because at least in my dreams I can't tell the difference between the life I crave but can't have and the life I do have... I know I'm just a teen and I'm sure it's normal and all but I was wondering just how normal is it?